Few Miami Florida Attorney Jokes
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by: AnastasiaKlinner463
Total views: 27
Word Count: 490
Date: Sat, 29 Oct 2011 Time: 1:24 PM
Q: How does a pregnant woman know she is carrying a future Florida attorney?
A: She has an extreme craving for baloney.
Q: What is the legal definition of an Appeal?
A: Something a person slips on in a grocery store.
Q: Why did God make snakes just before Florida lawyers?
A: To practice.
Q: What do you call a Miami Attorney with an IQ of 12?
A: Your Honor.
Q: What is the difference between Florida lawyers and a herd of buffalo?
A: The Florida lawyers charge more.
Q: What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a Miami bar association convention?
A: The caterer.
Q: Why are Florida lawyers like nuclear weapons?
A: If one side has one, the other side has to get one.
Q: What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a Miami general attorney?
A: An offer you can't understand.
Q: What do you call a florida lawyer gone bad?
A: Senator
Q: Did you hear they just released a new Barbie doll called "Divorced Barbie"?
A: It comes with half of Ken's things and alimony.
Q: What's the difference between an miami attorney and a pit bull?
A: Jewelry.
Q: What's the definition of mixed emotions?
A: Watching your Florida attorney drive over a cliff in your new Ferrari.
Q: What is the difference between florida lawyers and florida accountants?
A: At least accountants know that they are boring.
Stories:
1. A man who had been caught embezzling millions went to a miami lawyer. His miami lawyer told him, "Do not worry. You will never go to jail with all that money? In fact, when the man was sent to prison, he did not have a dime.
2. As the Miami lawyer awoke from surgery, he asked, "Why are all the blinds drawn?" The nurse answered, "There's a fire across the street, and we did not want you to think you had died."
3. God decided to take the devil to court and settle their differences once and for all. Satan heard this, laughed and said, "And where do you think you're going to find a florida lawyer?"
4. A miami lawyer is sitting at the desk in his new office. He hears someone coming to the door. To impress his first potential client, he picks up the phone as the door opens and says, "I demand one million and not a penny less." As he hangs up, the man now standing in his office says, "I'm here to hook up your phone."
And finally:
You Might Be A Florida Attorney If.... You are charging someone to read these jokes.
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